Y2K

Y2K.  It's the Year of 2nd grade and Kindergarten. 

From the day a child arrives, parents hear how fast the time flies.  That's not always because you're having so much fun, by the way!  There have been moments I wish time had flown by -- the sessions of bewildering crying jags, changing the smelliest diapers known to mankind, the mysterious food aversions, tantrums, and as they get older there is bickering, sullenness, backtalk -- in general:  'Tude!   

Aside from those frustrating and unavoidable experiences, however, there are the moments I wish I could freeze for eternity:  Regular morning cuddles on the couch, arms wrapped around my legs giving the tightest, squeeziest hugs, reciprocal "I love yous," seeing my kids understand a new idea, say some very grown-up phrase or make a mature observation... Those are the times I realize how quickly my children are growing up.

Benjamin will begin 2nd grade tomorrow and Elizabeth will be in Kindergarten.  She is eager; he is not.  She loves to learn; he would rather play.  She wants to please; he would rather be pleased.  She can be bold and adventurous; he is more unsure and hesitant.  Two very different temperaments; two very precious little people.  

Kindergarten for Elizabeth is familiar ground for this mom since Ben has already been there; I have some idea of what to expect.  Second grade will be a whole new deal, though, and I find myself anxious for my little man.  The jump from First to Second grade seems so big.  Will every successive year be like this?! 


I want both my children to shine, to find their "zone" where they can flourish, an environment where they can discover their niche and be excited about what they're learning, experiencing, seeing, hearing, touching.  I want RICH opportunities that will help them grow into even more awesome individuals.  I want to be involved, to be alongside them to capture their awe and wonder, their sense of accomplishment, to be on-hand so I can praise them for a job well-done... 


I tease Ben and Elizabeth sometimes about how they should stop growing, but really, it's one of life's grandest gifts.  They are my life's grandest gifts.  I treasure and adore them and only hope their Y2K will be a grand gift for them.

Heart Aches

When a mother sees her child ache, her heart aches, too.  

My son LOVES playtime with friends.  Daily, and sometimes repeatedly within a day, he asks to play with a friend.  While I usually don't mind having friends play at our house, what I DO mind is the fact that Ben is rarely invited to anyone else's house to play. 

I have a 3-call limit; if, after contacting 3 friends, there are no takers to our invitation, I'm done.  It happens A LOT.  I witness my son go from hopeful to tears on some days.  "He's playing at so-and-so's house."  "He's hanging out with so-and-so."  "He's too tired."  "He's playing with family - sorry."  "She has other plans."  There is one friend - one - who would probably have Ben over to play every day if she could.  Other than this one little girl, I can't even remember the last time someone (a parent) called to invite Benjamin over to play.  It never happens. 

It concerns me.  I know my son is not perfect but do other kids not like my son?  Does he not play well with others?  Why isn't he invited over?  I don't know how to inquire without putting parents on the spot.  I don't know how to ask without sounding like some overprotective worry-wart mom.  Besides, is any mom really going to be honest with me and say if Ben is disliked?

But the truth is, I worry for Ben.   With confessed and absolute bias, Benjamin Levi is my most beloved little man.  He is sweet and can be terribly sensitive.  Of course, I want him to be well-liked and accepted.  No mother wants to think her child is otherwise.

So, what's a mom to do?  When he asked me to tickle him, I did.  When he suggested we play jacks, I said Yes.  This is what I need to do - be there for my little guy.  When he feels a void, it's my job, my privilege, my joy to fill it.  And then we are both filled. 

And the heartaches subside.

Those Three Little Words

Two posts in one night?  Who'd a thunk it?  Not me, but I could not let this linger in my brain too long, for fear of losing the tenderness of the moment.

It is extremely rare to hear the words "I love you" from my son, Benjamin. Tonight, however, he absolutely melted my heart!  Made my day!  Caused my heart to sing!

He and his sister like to have "sleep overs" in each other's room.  Earlier this evening, he'd been quite a pill (disrespect is our current issue) and I was on the brink of banning the request.  As happens too often, I caved, but this time, it was entirely worth it.

They were only into the night 15 minutes and Ben was already asking for his sister to go back to her room.  It can be impossible to squelch her chatter.  This time, it was her burping in his face (oh, where are the manners?!).  I was a little surprised; after all, he's a boy.  He burps and makes pooters all the time!

Anyway, I sent a tearful - well, actually, wailing - little girl back to her room.  I asked Ben if he would not be willing to give her another chance.  Yes, he said, but requested they sleep on the floor.  I relented and as I was laying his comforter down, gathering pillows and blankets and getting them settled, he said those magic words.  Not once, not twice, but three times!

He not only said the words but gave me a wonderful, lingering hug around my middle - another coveted and infrequent display of his affection.  He explained to me the three little words "came to his brain and so he said them to me - they were 'a note from God'." Truly!

Because Time Flies

The saying goes there are only two things certain in life:  Death and Taxes.  I beg to differ; I believe there is a third and it is called Change.  It's one thing you can absolutely count on, whether it's welcome, invited, or not!!  And with children, it simply cannot be avoided and that's a good thing!

As parents, we do not wish to see our children remain in any one phase their entire lives.  Oh, sure, some phases seem more delightful than others -- that sweet, innocent phase of infancy when they coo and gurgle, laugh with sparkly eyes, and snuggle close in your arms.  Or that charming moment they take their first steps, manage a spoon independently, lose their first tooth, read their first sentence, or learn to tie their shoes... but you wouldn't really want it to end there, would you?  No, me either.

From the commencement of parenthood, I have heard repeatedly how time flies when raising children.  Don't blink!  Slow down!  Before you know it, they will have graduated, moved on, married, and have children of their own...

Sigh.  It's true.  A little over 6 years ago, I became a mom to the most precious boy, Benjamin.  A mere 17 months later, his baby sister, Elizabeth, came along.  Those first few years were definitely a time of challenge and change.  Parenting is not for the faint of heart!  Along with those challenges, however, have been countless moments of joy, pride, and a swelling of the heart when I see either of my children get it - whatever it may be.

My memory only gets less dependable with each successive year, and even though I'd like to think I really will remember events, I know I won't.  And so, I wish to chronicle their growth in a manner that will allow me to revisit those special accomplishments because, as we know, time flies all too fast.